Jessie and I went to a wedding recently. The nuptials took place in St. Andrews, in The Kingdom of Fife, Scotland.
This was the first wedding we had been to since our daughter’s marriage 14 years ago. The bride was Jessie’s niece (for the record, her brother’s daughter). She works “in the media, darling” and this was going to be “an occasion.”
Being a Philistine, I jokingly said “Oh, well then, I will be able to wear my usual gardening attire of scruffy clothes set off by dark blue overalls.”
BIG mistake. A forensic examination of my wardrobe then ensued. Not one item was deemed appropriate for THE wedding. The whole kit and caboodle was to be new, even down to socks. I tried gently to explain to my newly self-appointed personal shopper that neither the bride, nor the groom nor any of the 160 or so guests would be remotely interested in my socks – and so it proved.
I was more than a little miffed because not once – not once – during the whole day of the wedding did anyone approach me and say:-
“My word David, you look a million dollars in those socks. Stunning.”
The bride and groom and the vast majority of the guests (including Jessie) were Gaels from the Isle of Lewis in the Outer Hebrides and they like “a do.” The civil marriage ceremony was wonderful, overflowing with love and happiness.
A Gaelic choir sang Psalm 108, which was hauntingly beautiful (although I didn’t understand a word of it), and I was not the only one with tears flowing freely.
After the ceremony and the meal, it was time party and “ee gads” how the Gaels can party!
The band was terrific with a great mix of genres.
As the night progressed, the dancing become more frenzied, rounded off with an outrageously fast Strip The Willow, the most dangerous dance invented by man. It was carnage with bodies flying around all over the place.
No one died but to paraphrase the Duke of Wellington, after his victory at the Battle of Waterloo, “it was a close-run thing.”
It was a brilliant wedding and to my knowledge everyone enjoyed it to the full, including my socks.